The couple suffers from adopting with children, and all mothers are honored for Mother’s Day

My husband and I adopted Four children within seven years. I clearly remember the nine -month -old. I was wearing her in her custody when she got out that she was with me as long as she was with her first mother.

He brought me this revelation to cry. I only have love and respect for each of the first mothers of my children, also known as their name Mothers of birth. In fact, we have an open adoption with every birth family, in varying degrees, making Mother’s Day more private for us.

Open adoption can appear many different ways

Open adoption It can vary when it comes to the amount of adoption and childbirth with each other. The possibilities include video conversations, text messages, social media communication, e -mail, snail, communication through the adoption agency or lawyer, and even visits. Openness can recede and flow.

Just as in any relationship, health limits and mutual expectations are important. I have found that many open adoptions are “direct and learning” cases. We fail to obtain it correctly, so humility and grace are incredibly important. Over the years, I learned that the glue that brings us together is our mutual love for our child and the methods.

as AdoptI don’t feel the need to compete with the first mothers of my children. I also refuse anyone trying to put me on the base of the statue to adopt my children. Especially when my children were younger, strangers were approaching us and telling my children that they were “very lucky” to adopt them by “such parents and mothers.” I was also thanked for “adopting the needy children.” Every time, I correct strangers, saying that we, the fathers, are lucky. After all, we get the honor to be their second family and adoption.

The first mothers of my children dear Ali

I do not tolerate any lack of respect for the families of my first children, including their mothers. Their stories are sacred to me, and the reasons for my children to adopt are not for public consumption. The identities of their first mothers and personal information are especially due to shame or embarrassment, but respect. These women were born my children, and the DNA passes through the veins of my children.

The common wrong belief is that my children are confused because they can reach communication with their first mothers. This is completely incorrect. We feel that we are enabling our children by giving them the information and access they are entitled to obtain. After all, my children did not decide to put it Adoption.

The truth is that they have two families, and both of these families are important. There is no place in our house of secrecy, because the secrecy generates shame. We have talked to our children frankly about their adoption and their first families since they put in our arms.

Mother’s Day is special for us

Every year in May, we chose greeting cards to send the first mothers to our children Mother’s Day. I allowed each child to choose the card and decide whether they want to sign it, or whether the card will be from me, or to the mother. I respect that adoption is very complicated, and my children do not compel me to have maternal feelings just because there is a vacation. However, my children feel completely on Mother’s Day righteous.

There is no objection to participating today with the first mothers of my children. After all, I chose to build, and the early mothers of children chose me to be the mother of our second child. There is room for all mothers – and those who are the mother – on Mother’s Day. My children are raised in a comprehensive house where both mothers are honored and I will not get it in any other way.