Therapists share what the clients of the people who are talking about

• People who make their needs in the end and rely on their decisions on others.
• They learn these childhood behaviors, which often lead to problems in adults.
• Business Insider told the common issues that people who bring him to treatment include paralysis of the analysis.

Performing people, or the needs of others before you, may seem a positive feature.

But people are speaking not to know their emotional needs, and they do not think that they are important, according to Nasser’s Israeli wizard, to Business Insider.

People simply do not want to make others happy, but fear of them Forgelza, the summer, a California shock therapist, told Bi that he feels threatened and defeated them in “the response of the talak”, when someone interacts with a threat by suppressing their feelings to satisfy another person.

Melissa Stanger, a psychologist based in New York, said it is a behavior that we learn in childhood if we feel the need to take care of a parent or anyone else in order to meet our needs.

She said: “You need to reduce your own needs in their favor, either to make it from the Acting Acts you need or because they have no room for your needs at all.”

People who are often unable to consciously realize that they do it, and this is a common behavior pattern but it is often misunderstood that often leads to challenges in adults.

Nasser, Forlenza and Stanger Bi told the common issues that their customers bring people to treatment.

1) Relationship problems

Stanger said that people often seek looking for treatment due to conflict and resentment in their relationships. But they will not necessarily realize that these issues are the result of their behavior to cancel people.

“Many people will say,” I have this struggle with a partner, and I don’t know how to address it. “They usually know how to treat it. That is because they are afraid to endanger the relationship.

“People rush themselves over and over again by giving priority to the threat to themselves,” Nasser said.

Frankness about their feelings can create resentment over time, which is likely to be connected in other ways.

Nasser said: “Often, people will tolerate a lot of pain before they say something, and they usually say this in a very negative way or a kind of method of collapse,” Nasser said.

For example, instead of connecting what you could get realistic, a Nasir customer has spent over its means and became upset with a friend who has made money more than suggested expensive activities.

Nasser said: “She followed that her friend would not understand and began hate her friend based on that,” Nasser said. “This often happens with people who do not transfer their needs.”

2) Difficulty making decisions

Nasser says that her employees often face “paralysis of analysis”, and find it difficult to make decisions, especially with regard to their job, living situation, relationship, or other personal circumstances.

One of the customers remained in a long -standing job for a long time instead of applying for a promotion or another role in the company because it was very concerned about making the wrong decision.

Forelinza said the pressure of the desire to “keep everyone is happy” adds to this hesitation.

“I feel a lot of anxiety and fear that people can be upset with me to take this choice,” she said.

3) Emotional fatigue and workplace

This can happen if a fun person is afraid to tell their manager that he got a lot of work, for example. Forelinza said its customers could have difficulty taking PTO because they are worried than making their co -workers more difficult.

“It is just a complete recipe for exhaustion and exhaustion,” she said.

Nasser had a client who fought to leave a vacation from his health care job and fainted him from fatigue during a dual shift.

She said that emotional exhaustion or “salvation” is also common among people, as they may feel that they always take care of others, but no one takes care of them.

People who are happy to know how to check the emotional temperature of the room and expect others’ needs very quickly. Nasser said: “So it is a lot of cognitive work burden.”

Train to talk about your mind to reduce the desire to compensate people.

Nasser said that the first step towards changing these behavior patterns to determine the priorities of your special needs is to improve emotional literacy. It gives customers a language to describe their emotions, and often begins with the wheel of feelings, which set the basic feelings we test. This helps customers learn to learn what emotions feel physically.

The next step is to learn to carry uncomfortable feelings. Nasser said: “They do not know how to tolerate if someone feels disappointed because they are always acting to avoid it. So they have no much experience in confronting him.”

She said that it is about the ability to sit there and watch someone angry or disappointed and allows the other person to have his feelings without “reforming him.”

Finally, people need direct communication, which means expressing ideas and feelings clearly and frankly.

Stanger recommends finding a reliable or close friend you can play these types of conversations with her. This can help you feel more confident in expressing your feelings in real life scenarios.